25 Jul “It´s not about wanting it to get better; it´s that it is better, now; the present is real.”
“Oh!”, HR replies as she takes a sip of soda, “you got me a present?”
“No”, I reply as I shake my head, “I mean the present moment–you´re in it.”
“Yeah”, she replies as she sets her lata down, “of course, I´m in the present–where else could I be?”
“Your mind is not in the present–it´s wrapped up in a story.”
“Story of my life–a sad girl looks for meaning and purpose in a confused world?”
“Yeah”, I reply as I pick up my taza, “you clearly have been attaching to much to the telenovelas Humphrey Gives Headaches.”
“Yeah”, I reply as I take a sip of coffee, “but it´s not real–try this–
Watch it without sound and listen to something different–it will confuse your mind and keep you present.
When you do this, you are not attaching to the show, as if it was real–I don´t know if your mind is able to understand that it is different. The moving pictures mixed with the sound, to your mind, confuse reality with fantasy or fiction. Instead, like me, I have not listened to TV, when I´m alone, in several years–instead I just watch it like I´m observing a TV show, which it is, but with a different audio soundtrack, like a digitalCD or the radio, I don´t confuse it for reality–my mind does not make the show real; I stay connected to my ACTUAL real reality; I stay present–
Whatever you do, always stay present–detach from the stories, when you are alone.
It´s not real, your mind may not understand that; it may be something that although you rationalize that it is a show–to your subconscious mind, which can´t tell the difference, and is much more powerful then your analytical mind, the story of the show becomes how you view and understand the world; it´s simply this is how reality is and the foundation upon which you view, and judge, the world; the story of the show, you need to guard yourself against–it´s entertainment, but what is real?”
“You´re a real pain in the ass when you tell these stories”, HR replies as she takes another sip of soda.
“There!”, I reply as I take another sip of coffee, “that is real–your family of origin and your family that you choose are real. When you go to someone´s house, and spend time with them, in their natural settings–that is real. When you are in public and everyone has a reputation to maintain and an image to protect, and project, that is pretend–and, not intrinsically bad–but, the way people behave in public, in the city or walking around their neighbor, are manufactured and developed through the storylines of the shows–are the telenovelas real or a reflection of life? Really, they are a caricature of how we should experience and live life.”
“So”, HR replies as she sets her lata down, “when LupieDupie slapped her husband in the episode last week, that´s what I should do?”
“You´re on the right track”, I reply as I take a sip and set down my taza, “but because LupieDupie slapped her husband–you don´t have to. In your mind, you, LD, slapped her husband–you, attaching to the story, slapped your husband–you view yourself as her so her actions are your actions, in your mind. LD slapped the shit out of her husband for all of us.”
“She´s my hero”, HR replies as she looks at her hand.
“Don´t get any ideas”, I reply as I pick up my taza.
“Just once, dad?”, HR turns her head to me and pouts.
“No, Honduras”, I reply as I take a sip of coffee, “let go of your aggressive tendencies, towards others, and instead just watch the show–it will calm you. But, don´t attach to the story, in your mind, that it is real–keep some distance but keep focused on it. If you do it this way, it is a meditative exercise–it will help calm your mind to spend some time connected to reality–to observe but confuse your mind that it is purely entertainment. Do you understand the difference between digitalnovelas and what´s happening in your life–well, your mind can´t. Your subconcisous is on auto-pilot so you need to develop new commands for it–train it, teach it, develop it, to not attach to the story that is being told, but instead to be a slave to your reasoning, logic, intuition; it´s a good co-pilot–but, it can´t be in charge, as it has no checks on it´s behavior. Your subconcisous mind should, instead, be a check on your conscious mind–which should guide and control you–the thinking mind. It´s having an emergency brake where you can internatlize that–
´Hey this is not right–my intuition says that this is not a good, or the right, decision or thing to do.´
Something´s wrong–trust yourself when you say, or feel, or consider, that. Know that LD slapping her husband created a new scenario in your mind that will help, if you let it, guide you in your behavior–this shit is all like super scientific and… like… major pyschological. Trust your intution–let it be a check on your actions.”
“Speaking of which”, HR replies as she takes a sip of soda, “I´m going to check when the show is on next.”
“Thursday at 7pm”, I reply as I take a sip of coffee, “I anticipated that we would ultimately talk about the show, so this morning I checked the time of the next episode. Got to stay one step ahead of my girlstudent.”
“Ok”, she replies as she sets her lata down, “you´re strange, dad.”
“Better to be strange then a stranger; better to be in control then controlled, right?”