"I'm not comfortable with my new name", Hooligan Red tells me as she turns her head and looks off into the distance. "What's wrong with Pantalones Blue?", I ask Pantalones Blue as I turn my head to her. Continuing, "many distinguised people on Dorinto have worn blue pants in the past. What's your problem, yo?" "It's just", Pantalones Blue replies, "that He wears blue pants, Yo." "Who is he?", I ask PB, "what are you talking about?" "That...

"How'd you know?", Hooligan Red asks me as she gets up from her recliner. "How'd I know what?", I ask Hooligan Red as I close my eyes and recline my chair, "what the final words would be?" "Yeah." "I didn't", I tell her as I open my eyes and look over to see her leaving the living room, "it just came to me naturally." "So, what are the words?", Hooligan Red calls out from...

"This is why I fell in love with you", I tell my wife. Continuing, "I like it when you complain, kinda. You are including me in your life." 1 TELL ME ABOUT COGNITIVE BEHAVIOR THERAPY To give my best Jerry Seinfeld impersonation, “So What’s The Deal With CBT?” Or to back up, what is CBT. CBT stands for Cognitive Behavior Therapy.  It’s a form of psychotherapy – Basically, it works by dealing with the mind,...

"Looking at adding words/vocals on the music", I tell Pink Lips. "That's #stupidAF", Pink Lips tells me as she looks away, "let me play the piano on top of it, Yo." "How about we team up?", I ask Pink Lips as I turn my head to her; she turns her head to me; we fist bump. "Done", we say simultaneously. "If you ain't going next level", I tell Pink Lips as hit #playAF on...

"Excuse me?", I reply as I look over to Fresh Kill. "No", Fresh Kill replies as she gets up from her recliner, "I spilled mustard on my t-shirt. One sec, I'll be right back. Let me change." I look back down at the keyboard; what famous words am I going to write for the ending of Sexo & Muerto 2, I think; I pick up my coffee and take a sip; it's #hotAF;...

"You don't know me", the man on the couch replies as he sits up, "I am a great guy." "I know." "You remember that time that I bought you a hotdog? You FUCKING loved that hotdog." "Yes", I reply as I gaze off into the distance, "it was quite the delicious hotdog." I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you...

"Now, it's my turn", HR winds up and FUCKING nails the FUCK out of that GOD DAMN MOTHER FUCKING punching bag; I add the profanity for feelings; emotional content to convey the situation; that MOTHER FUCKING punching bag didn't have a chance, yo. The punching bag barely moves; just like when I hit it. VERY USEFUL TIPS ON HOW TO DEAL WITH A CONTROLLING SPOUSE {Link Bit.ly/2t7LcSx} If your spouse makes all the choices in...

It was the greatest sensation of existence; not to trust - but to know. Ayn Rand •Retired at 29•Won $129k in engineering bids last 6-months of work•Moved outside the US in November 2013•Passed Engineering Licensing, Engineer-In-Training, LEED AP BD+C, LEED GA, Life Coaching exams all on 1st try•Backpacked solo 9 countries•Friends with JFK and Lyndon Johnson's PR Adviser (also called him granddad RIP)•Dropped out of MBA program with a GPA of 3.75•Professionally...

Continuing, "what you have now: your mug, your coffee, this house--all these things are things that you should cherish. Right?" "But, if it will break", HR replies as she sets her cup on her end table. "Appreciate and acknowledge what is present; respect how things are; emotional connections belong to the people around you; in life, you'll get a few friends, if you're lucky." She has friends and Benjamin's; with money and pussy,...

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