05 Apr “Time-travel”, I say to the class.
I stop and take off my glasses.
“Time-travel”, I say again, “is made up of two components: time and distance. For example, if you walk one kilometer in one hour, you have time traveled one kilometer in one hour. Does this make sense?”
I pause and look at the packed auditorium to see if anyone raises their hand.
“For example, speed is kmh or mph, this is time-travel. We ultimately started to discover near the third point that there are vectors upon a rotating sphere–naturally there was an inherent velocity with being on a spinning object. For example, if you take a basketball and tape a piece of paper to it, then throw it in the air–the paper does not have a velocity relative to the basketball, yet it does have a velocity. Make sense?”
I pause and look again at the auditorium; still no questions?
“What we began looking at is how everything on Earth is traveling at a speed–even though relative to the Earth there is no change in distance relative to time; by standing still, there is still a velocity. As we began to look at speed, this way, we discovered that there is a vector that can be calculated for all objects on the Earth–a vector being a speed with a direction. Ok?”
I pause and scan the crowd.
One person stands up.
“Excuse me”, the person says, “can I go to the bathroom?”
“No”, I reply, “pee on yourself.”
I continue talking.
“There is a vector that objects, with mass, have by being still–using this as a control, we were able to calculate, mathmatically, the change in velocity needed to create a new time-travel speed. Yes?”
I put my glasses back on.
“If you could circumnavigate the Earth in one minute and land one foot West from where you started–you would have gone back one day in one minute. Right?”
I open the bag of potato chips on the table. I reach in and grab one; these are fucking delicious!
“If you could do this over and over, you would gradually be going back in time–right?”
I look at the audience.
“Well, you can´t. You are exactly where you are. Where you go, there you are. We found that the best way to time-travel was to rediscover music, books, and media created in different eras and how it could still apply, and be relevant today. For example, listening to a song from 1988 makes it 1988, to you. Relative to everything, you are in 1988. Still that does not really work in the world–to have people in different times; instead there´s an agreed upon progression of time.
Time-travel: in the time that you have spent reading this–how far have you traveled?
The people in the auditorium start looking around at each other.
“The real question is then:
How much travel are you going to do in the next hour–the next day, year, month, decade? I don´t mean linear–if you walk half a kilometer away from here and then retrace your steps, you have traveled one kilometer. In how much time? What if you walked half a kilometer from here and then took a different route back that took two kilometers to return to the point of orgin. You would have traveled two and a half kilometers.”
I take off my glasses and rub between my eyes.
“So how long is it going to take you? Find out!”
I pause; anything else that I want to say?
I turn the lights on in the auditorium; grab another potato chip; man, these things are fucking delicious!
I pause and turn my head to look out the window; I turn back to the laptop; close the lid; the computer turns off; I get up from my chair and walk over to the fridge.
Opening it, the first thing that I notice is that the bottle of soda is nearly empty.
I call out, “I´m going to the store to get more soda. You need anything?”